Being social

We all know that man is a social animal
But what is exactly being social?
Does it only mean just to stay in a society?
Does it only mean to stay together?
There are many different type of people on the face of this earth. Each person has his own habits, cultures, castes, religions etc etc.
These factors make a man behave the way he does, the way he meets people, the way he talks to people, the way he interacts with them.

If a person does not like to meet people or if he is very reserved, does he become anti-social?
Well people around this type of a person would definitely say that he is an anti-social person.
So does it mean that you have to say Hi or Hello to every one where you go no matter you know that person or not?
Just imagine such a situation where you are walking on the road and you are saying hi to each and every person you meet on the road, people may think you have gone crazy and need a psychiatrist.
No being social does not mean that you say hi and hello to each and every person you meet on the road even if you don’t know them but it surely means that you should at least do that with people you know. It does not take much time to say “Hi, How r u doing? How is everyone at home?” It hardly takes a minute or two. By doing this the person whom you just greeted would feel good and you surely will be in their good books.
The main question here is what would I get by doing this? Why is it important to do this? Why should I waste my precious time? Who cares if everything is ok at their end? These all are the questions that a person may ask if he feels that doing this does not matter.
But the fact is by doing this you are telling a person that you do care for them (though you may not) .It gives a positive impression on the person. You never know when you need help from someone. It may happen that you may need help and no one is giving it to you but this person whom you used to greet may really help you. You will really be surprised so as to why did that person help you? The answer is that you used to greet this person whenever you used to meet him and that had given him a positive impression about you and so he felt that if you need help he should give it to you. Greeting this person only took a minute of yours but the result was big. It costs you nothing to greet people but it can make a big difference.

Now it may so happen that there is a person whom you don’t like at all and don’t even want to talk to, should you still greet such a person?
As I said before you may never know when you need that person’s help. You should also greet a person whom you do not like. I am not saying that you should hang around with this person; I am just saying you should just greet him so that u don’t spoil relations with this person.
You must have heard a hindi proverb “Musibat padne par ghade ko bhi baap banana padta hai” its English translation is that: “If you are in trouble, you may even have to make a donkey your father” so what I mean to say is that even if you don’t like a person you should still keep good relations with him, he may help you if you need help.

So does that mean that you become a double faced person?
No doing this does not make you a double faced person. A double faced person is a person who praises you in front of other people and abuses you behind your back. This world is full of such people. But I am not telling you to praise that person or hanging out with him. I am just telling you to keep good relations with him that’s it.
Praising a person you don’t like on his face and abusing him behind his back is being double faced but keeping good relations with a person whom you don’t like without praising or abusing him is being social.
This was one such example at a very basic level of being social.

What if you are very reserved and don’t like to meet new people?
I have seen many such people who are very reserved and don’t like to meet new people. When they meet someone new they just do a simple Hi or hello and don’t do anything else and just keep quiet…that’s probably because they r too shy or don’t know how to start a conversations.
So what I suggest to such people is that it’s ok if they don’t like to meet but just for the sake of being social. . This does not make them double face but at least people won’t think they are “Snobs”

Well so that were some things I notice around me... So I conclude this note saying .. “Be Happy , Be Social”

Choosing a career

How difficult is it to choose a career?

What does a career mean to you?

Is it all about money?

Some People are really confused while choosing a career, Why is this so?

These are the questions that come up when a student chooses a career.

A career should be something that a student likes or he/she is interested in.

It can be anything at all that satisfies their interest and at the same time does not spoil their image in the society. What I mean by this is that if you have interest in obscene things such as sex or fling does not mean you become a sex worker for its sake. As sex workers are not given a proper status in our society and nor does the law give its permission. A career should be something that retains your dignity in the society.

Does this mean that you have to do only jobs that have high pay?

The answer is no. No profession is bad unless and until you retain your dignity. Your pay is decided not by the profession you choose but by your ability and your experience in that field.

For example: If a guy wants to be a hairdresser, he would think twice before going for such a profession. In hindi lingo he will be called a HAJAAM, with a really low pay .But when you see the hairdressers like Hakim Alim who charges you a fortune for a simple haircut. Places like Juice hair salon are most famous for their hairstyling and charge big amount. Do you still think that such professions are low paying ones?

Some people don’t want to choose a career because people have wrong notions about it. For example: If a guy wants to become a fashion designer he will surely think twice before going for it only because most of the people think only the guys who are gays go for such professions. The reason is that most of the famous fashion designers turn gays…all thanks to the media to spread such things.

The girls in most cases are not allowed to become models because their families think it’s a bad profession and it only means exposing your body all over. Also the scandals with wannabe models add fuel to the fire.

In Indian society it becomes really difficult for the students to convince their parents for such professions. The myths that have been bestowed in the minds of people are almost impossible to remove completely.

As a result of this, the students take up professions that their parents want them to take or take up the profession that gives them most pay. They sacrifice their likes and interest for the sake of their parents or some other reason.

After the students choose their profession they may think that they don’t want to do what they are doing right now, they wanted to do something else but could not do it for some reason or the other. They feel that they are forced to do something that they never wanted to do but by that time it is too late.

By this the only memory that comes to my mind is of the movie American Desi where the sikh boy wanted to become a set decorator and his father wanted him to become an engineer. But in the end his father understands that his son is really good in the profession what he wants to do and lets him do it. Hope the parents understand this in the real life also and not only in movies.

In recent times, the things are changing. People are not afraid to take up profession that they really want to take up and even the parents are supporting them. But in some cases still the pressure that gets to the student and forces them to take up the profession they don’t want to do and sometimes because of such pressure students attempt suicide.

Some students come to me and ask me what profession they should take up. What career is IN??I ask them only 1 thing.

What do you want to do?

They give me a confused look at this, so I tell them that I am no 1 to tell them what they should do. I ask them their interests, favorite subject, their passion, their interests etc… Then I tell them to take up a career which interests them based on the answers they gave me.

They thank me for helping them to choose their career and I tell them that it wasn’t me who told them what their career should be, they themselves choose their career.

Some of these students tell me that I should become a counselor to guide other students for their career. I just laugh at this and say that I am not a good counselor but it’s the students themselves. It’s only the student who knows the best what he or she want to take up as their career. No 1 can help them take a decision which is correct except for themselves.